Spare the Rod and Smarten the Child Buddy!

 Patience! Hope! - is what you have to hold on it. A wise man without patience will raise his eyebrows-frowning all over-he will act as if he has got ants in the pants and desperately look for another wise like him and then together they will move mountains and earth to prove that people like me are naïve and  aloof from ground reality.  But one thing is damn sure-we have differences…

Have you heard about EXTRINSIC MOTIVATION?  This stuff works magic with kids.   Today’s kids are mentally delicate because of various pressures from all the sides. There is pressure from teachers and parents-kids are constantly reminded that they need to imbibe swiftly and deliver swiftly when demanded in the exam or in the job market. “We deprive ourselves to make you go to school-always be aware that we bear all this pain for you-our sacrifices should never go in vain-you are our hope!”

“World is cruel-it is all about the survival of the fittest-you got to be the best-the fastest-the smartest…you have to be the winners” naturally stress gets good of our kids and lets accept it-they are treated like a programmed robots.

Even in their circle-they think they have to prove-they feel that they are always being judge by their comrades around. At teen-they crave for attention-at the back their head they keep on saying, “I got to prove!”  In the course of proving the world what he is-he drags on and on-inviting more confusing and frustration. Conformist environment kills his self belief and dreams.  Thus, his self-esteem goes down to the drain.

Forget about my personal feeling about being teenager-I have spent almost five years with the middle secondary going students-goodness-their(Many) self-esteem is too lane and lanky. They are too protective about their self-image. Thus, you too might have come across- today’s teenagers are emotionally sensitive-even more sensitive towards those events or situation which are apparent to damage their self-esteem; you scold-some will take to their heart all the time-some will exhibit their raw attitude.  we have to think million times when you are using-Name-and shame strategy- it can psychologically kill a child-and mind you-a dead kid inside is a dead kid outside-suicide is triggered when we damage their self-esteem…instilling fear and taming can be seen by kids as stabilizing your dominance over them…your good intention can be always misread…don't compare your upbringing scenario and push it to today's kids...rather than sticking to old hard rule-why not innovative and move forward with style and elegance 

Despite of all this speculation, kids yearn for emotional support-they seek inspiration deep inside.  They want us to understand them-this is where extrinsic motivation comes to the scene. Positive probing-positive reinforcement boosts their confidence and gradually they learn to open-up. We need to cater to their psychological needs and this extrinsic motivation gradually radiates all other positive attitudes in them. Self belief can be restored…

Folks! Again I’m saying-Patience! Perseverance! And hope…lets inspire and mould our kids with goodness-providing a space for them to grow...so buddy! Better spare the rod and smarten the child...

                                                                                                                       

  

Conformity kills an individual

You know you are well knitted around-they have clipped you and caged you according to their tune.  They are sure that you are yet another doll who would look awesome in their daily puppetry show. Inter-dependency keeps on ringing at back of your head-that makes you docile.  You are confused-but more scared that you might end up hurting your commune.  Controversy, criticism and fear of being targeted by mass leaves you no choice but to dance when they dance-cry when they cry. If they say “yellow” you got to say “yellow”- or else…

 “Sentiments of mass is always right-and you-you are just one wrong man!”  Groups look intimidating, so you are bound to be dummy.  Moreover, who likes hullabaloo around- that too against your own elite group. All you can do is suffocate yourself within-and you yell inside in sheer frustration, “Let me fly-I have my dreams!”

Staging an aggressive stereotypical setting-duplication of self becomes customary- persuaded by mass-they stamp you to death little by little.  You are growing but according to their standpoint. They frantically assure you that you know no good for yourself and they are here to shape you. 

Don’t you think you are here to design yourself according to your beliefs and attitude? You go around- first explore and then- you resolve down to give yourself a shape.  Yes, you are inter-reliant but you are not certainly just the same as others-you are different; you fellow but you may not copy. Your beliefs-your dreams are your greatest strength-once you doubt your beliefs and your dreams-you are dead.

Conformity is not a comfort but a curse…

I Hate Buddha

All I know about him is that he was no good father-no good son-no good husband. Goodness me! Can you believe it-this guy renounce kingship-I mean the best comfort which every people yearns for.   Must have lost his mind-otherwise who on this earth will throw away his rich family wealth and power-and that too when you are sound-27 bloody years old-who would? I am damn sure you won’t disagree-Beautiful princess, lovely son and heir to golden throne comes not to all-any people would envy him; but here we find this guy who sneak out into the wilderness relinquishing what every soul on earth lives for.

I heard a lot about him; he talks about suffering-nirvana-karma. Do you think I really care about it…sorry to say this but I find Kurt Cobain’s nirvana sexier than Buddha’s Nirvana.  And who the hell is this Karma? There are so many Karmas here-I hope he is not talking about my friend whose name is Karma Dorji.  And suffering-it’s just a pain in the ass-we got to deal with it-like it or not.  Perhaps money can rub off suffering-better run after money.

Must be really mad-I have to smirk here-how can you go around holding a bowl begging for food when you were destined to be a king. Ask any man on this world-they will definitely choose king over beggar-after all who wants to starve to death.  Be honest when I ask you-lets say you are given a choice either to become a yogi or to become a common man-which one would you like to go for? If you are saying "yogi" then I hope you must have thought millions times before uttering the word, “Yogi.”

Know what!  I have to see Buddha once-and there I will tell him all that I am telling you.  Right before his face I will yell , “BUDDHA I HATE YOU!”  Why shouldn't I say this-he is all crap!

Then I saw him…

courtesy: Google  

He was just there-I felt as if he was always meant to be there.  Emanating-easing-he looked so effortless.  I admit it was indeed mind boggling moment for me but I recollected myself- many times and kept reminding myself, “Hey you! Are not going to say you hate Buddha-step forward buddy you are very close now!”

Heavy! Can’t explain-my steps were getting gentle as I walked forward-I don’t know why eyes got fixed at him.  And my heart-had nothing-my mind-was all glass-empty.  It was so easy to be there-his eyes were gently closed and in lotus posture I saw him.  Can you believe it-a man who came to yell at Buddha was found supplicating before him-his teary eyes-his clasped hands rested on his chest and his lips quivering could only manage to whine like a lost puppy, “Lord! I hate you!  Lord I hate! You have been so kind! so kind!" Your voice breaks buddy-so does your heart.